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Love Quotes and Sayings for All Occasions

Funny Love Quotes

This section contains very funny love quotes.

Love is one of the deepest of emotions but it can also be very funny. Celebrate the lighter side of love with this collection of funny love quotes.

Funny Love Quotes

endangered speciesThey made love as if they were an endangered species. -- Peter de Vries.

love makes you feel sexierLove is the same as like except you feel sexier. - Judith Viorst

i hate people who don't love their fellow menI know that there are people who do not love their fellow man, and I hate people like that! -- Tom Lehrer

anniversaryTwelve years doesn't mean you're a happy couple. It just means that you're a long couple. -- Neil Simon

love at first sightAdam invented love at first sight, one of the greatest labor-saving machines the world ever saw. -- Josh Billings

you can't hide loveLove, the itch and a cough cannot be hid. -- Thomas Fuller

I am a fool for loving youI am two fools, I know, for loving, and saying so. -- john Donne

Funny Wedding Quotes

time makes love passLove makes the time pass. Time makes love pass. -- French proverb

rejected loverRejected lovers need never despair! There are four-and-twenty hours ina day, and not a moment in the twenty-four in which a woman may notchange her mind.--DE FINOD.

lover's know what they want , not what they needLovers know what they want, not what they need. -- Publius Syrious, (1st Century B.C.)

love can sweep you off your feetLove can sweep you off your feet and carry you along in a way you've never known before. But the ride always ends, and you end up feeling lonely and bitter. Wait. It's not love I'm describing. I'm thinking of a monorail. - Jack Handey

a proposalI'm afraid I was very much the traditionalist. I went down on one knee and dictated a proposal which my secretary faxed over straight away. -- Stephen Fry

amateursSex is the great amateur art. The professional, male of female, is frowned upon; he or she misses the whole point and spoils the show. -- David Cort

bigamyThe Lord Chief Justice was once asked by a lady what was the maximum punishment for bigamy: Two Mothers in Law. -- Lord Russel of Killowen

neighbour's wifeHe who enjoys a good neighbour, said the Greeks, has a precious possession. Same goes for the neighbour's wife. -- Nicholas Bentley

the art of loveI hate a woman who offers herself because she ought to do so, and, cold and dry, thinks of her sewing when she's making love. -- Ovid, The Art of Love

love is blindLove is said to be blind, but I know a lot of fellows in love who can see twice as much in their sweethearts as I can. -- John Billings

you should not marry the woman that you deserveIf we men married the women we deserved, we should have a very bad time of it. --

widowersSome widowers are bereaved; others relieved. -- Helen Rowland

keep them guessingIt is easier to keep half a dozen lovers guessing than to keep one lover after he has stopped guessing. -- Helen Rowland

more love less paperworkWhat the world really needs is more love and less paper work. Pearl Bailey

lingerieIf love is blind, what is the purpose of lingerie? -- Unknown

love is not wiseIt is impossible to love and to be wise. -- Francis Bacon

fall in loveIf you cannot inspire a woman with love of you, fill her to the brim with love of herself -- all that runs over will be yours. -- Charles Caleb Colton

expertWhen a scholar goes to seek out a bride he should take along an ignoramus as an expert. -- The Talmud

oldA man is only as old as the woman he feels. - Groucho Marx

first kissI kissed my first woman and smoked my first cigarette on the same day; I have never had time for tobacco since. -- Arturo Toscanini

geniusOne must have loved a woman of genius to appreciate the happiness there is in loving a fool. -- Charles Maurice de Talleyrand

the cost of loveLove: An ocean of emotions surrounded entirely by expenses. -- Thomas R. Dewar

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